It's not a tumah...

Great news! I get to take new medicine for the headaches. This time it's preventative, not maintenance, which is apparently what pain pills are. Not so great news, I have to take it everyday, twice. I haven't picked it up from the chemist yet because I'm a bit worried about the cost. It sounds expensive but then what do I know. I was the one that thought we'd have a replicator and sonic showers by now, it's twenty ten afterall.

The nerve cells in our brains fire electronic particles, all the time. Migraine sufferers supposedly have overexcited nerve cells and they fire too fast and too frequently. It's a better problem to have than nerve cells that fire too slow I suppose.

Slow things drive me crazy. I'm very type A, rush, rush. Waiting is anethema to me. Let's get it done and move on. But that's not important. I'm told I can eat a more balanced diet and get on with my life. I just need to take pills. Here's what bothers me. Do I want to take pills and more pills, and more pills as I age? It's not just the carrying them around in little boxes that bothers me, it's the thought of living past my natural life expectancy. I don't want to live forever and I certainly don't want to live just for the sake of being alive.

If there is some vast eternal plan at work I suppose I'll die when I'm supposed to whether or not I'm taking pills. By that logic it doesn't really matter. The thought of extending my life expectancy just because I can doesn't really appeal to me. When I get old I'll slow down and I don't want to.

All the best, Kate

Purse-peration

I have a love/hate relationship with purses, always have. No matter what style, type or size I have, one constant remains, my purses are never functional. I do enjoy sculpting purses out of cake. It's my new favorite thing.

I have had a variety of purses, all serving their purpose for small increments in time. There was a backpack phase when I was playing the piano for a job but I had to supplement that with a bag. It was fine for music but I could never find a pen, guitar pick. or saint's be praised, my phone.

I went from that to a tiny 'alwaysreadyforadate' purse with only enough room for a license, a debit card, and a lipstick. I could have gotten used to that if it weren't too small to fit my phone which I had to carry in my hand or a pocket. I had to retrace my steps a lot in search of my phone since I left it EVERYWHERE.

The thought of a bigger purse with comparments appealed to me and was great for the first 24 hours before it became disorganized. I stuck with that one for awhile though until I started having shoulder problems. I kept throwing my change in one of the compartments and it became heavy and hit the floor with a thud everytime I put it down. Discovering there are so many things I can't live without I began to fill it with everything. The only way to find anything was to turn it upside down and shake until everything fell out. When I got to the point that I started carrying my Star Trek action figures I decided it was time for something else.

I went from that to a ziploc bag. Not my highest point but it was very functional. I could always find what I wanted, when I wanted it. There was one big drawback, aside from the fact that everyone could see exactly what I was carrying, it looked ridiculous and stupid. It's virtually impossible to carry a concealed Captain Picard action figure in a ziploc purse. Kids want to play with it and adults think you're weird.

It occurred to me that Ebay may be a place to look for a nice purse selection, and I was correct. I found  a  nice leather purse that I like, simple and functional and midsized. It works pretty well and I've taken to cleaning it out every other day or so just to stay organized. I still have to dump everything out of it to find my phone but at least I'm remembering to empty the change out. As for Captain Picard and the away team? They're resting comfortably on a shelf.

All the best, Kate

P.S. Still have a headache, still eating well. What's up with that?

Headaches Continue, and not just the self inflicted ones.

Of the last 14 days of my headache diet I've had 12 headaches. I suppose it could be taking me that long to detox, but it seems unlikely. Looking back on my food diary it dawned on me that I can't think of anything. Wheat maybe but I don't eat a lot of it, or a lot of carbs for that matter. I haven't been drinking. I think I've only had a small glass of wine since Christmas, so it continues to be a conundrum to me.

Last year I took a daily medication and it worked but it was a hard adjustment. A couple days after my first few pills I was commissioned to play the piano at church. I felt tipsy and totally lacking focus. There were leaves dancing in the breeze and they shone through the stained glass window and caught my attention, holding it there until I completely spaced out the church service  The minister broke my trance and had to remind me to play the next hymn. I felt like the heroine in a twilight zone episode.

After a few weeks my spirits raised, I started sleeping better and the headaches started to go away. It happened so gradually I almost didn't notice. It was like one day I woke up and suddenly realized I didn't have headaches anymore. I began to adjust to the feeling  of being continually toasted. It was like having a central line with a conituous flow of whiskey, a perpetual happy hour. Never too drunk, never to sober just steady and kind of numb. I felt dull and uncreative. It was terrible, I had the ability to function but no desire, just the opposite of me with a headache. This is my brain on meds, ( nothing but us brain cells, shriveling with boredom ) this is my brain on headaches ( imagination soars to unbelievable heights and imaginary friends come out of the woodwork but they never shut up). It's all or nothing, intoxicating creativity or watching paint dry.

Such is my fate. I need to pick a lesser of two evils. Go back on the meds or keep experimenting with diet or whatever I can think of. I could try tai chi, hypnosis, energy healing, acupuncture or heated glass therapy. I tried chiropractic but it felt like a downward spiraling vortex that sucked me of money, not too mention a heightened awareness of spinal cord injuries. That's probably just scratching the surface of various therapies. I wonder if there's a therapy that involves fast cars and reggae.

I'll just keep on doing what I'm doing I guess and hope something  brilliant comes across the wire.

All the best, Kate

Really !

It was just one of those ridiculous days. You can't escape them because it's just part of the universal order of things. Call it Murphy's Law or whatever you like. It's the weird little oddities that are inevitable, really.

I finally found a great tasting sugar free cookie and it has 12 grams of fat in it. 
I visited my parents today and they have their thermostat set at 975 degrees, yes 975. It was so hot I got a sunburn, lost 4 pounds and started to peel on the drive home. They also pass gas alot and don't care who hears it.
I had a blood test today and I had to hold the tubes for the lab lady so she could use both hands.
Starbucks makes fantastic oatmeal with nuts and raisins for a mere $3.00
I drove 80 mph on the freeway and some idiot still tailgated me.
It only took me 6 minutes to drive to the bank which is 10 minutes away because I had all green lights.

To all of these things I say... REALLY...

I am about to scrounge the fridge looking for something for dinner. I may head back to Starbucks. That oatmeal made a lasting impression on me. So did it's 350 calories. I didn't have to eat the nuts and cranberries but I did, and it truly was delicious!

All the best, Kate

Sunday! Day of rest? By who's standards.

I'm beginning to understand the wisdom of eating small meals several times a day. It keeps one from making poor choices. I made a poor choice today, getting out of bed.

The day was a just little more stressful than I like but it was nice. I like when that happens. I did have to keep reminding myself to keep Christmas in my heart every other minute or so but I managed.


Long story, short version. I agreed to do a bridal show of the 'show your wares and samples as fast as you can to 500 brides' ilk. In the past I've done it and it's always come down to big investment, long hours and little return, but I'm hopeful. It's twenty-ten afterall and the brides were both beautiful and receptive. The organization and locale was stunning. The show was fun indeed. I was also booked to fill in for the musician at church. I thought it was supposed to be next week, but the dates were confused. It's usually a fun gig but today, today there was pressure.

My gentlemen husband, (he's so kind) left with me this morning, helped me set up our booth and then stayed at the show by himself while I ran out to play the piano. I played like the place was on fire! It was glorious. No fuss, no muss, just play, pray and on your way!!! I rushed back to the bridal show just as brides were beginning to trickle in and then that trickle turned into a flood and we were busy working our cake magic. Again, glorious!!

Is there a point you say! Truly, and here it is. I ate nothing all day but a 100% whole wheat english muffin with sugar free blueberry jam. My stomach started singing along during the sermon and continued right on through the offering. Thank God, for the communion, literally. I had a Homer Simpson moment.... brreeaad...hooo, and holy bread at that. Doh!

By the time we left the bridal show at 5:00 I was practically hallucinating. A nice man from a local restaurant strolled through passing out cookies and what did I do? I tackled him like a linebacker. I ate one cookie, but only one.

The poor choice was setting myself up to fail. Eating the cookie wasn't so terrible but  leaving myself with no other choices was nonsensical.  I should have gotten my keester out of bed and packed some carrots, fruit, rice cakes, anything!!  When we arrived home I inhaled a cup of decaf, vegan pizza, salad and a few kernels of last nights popcorn.. blaech!

Kids, I've learned my lesson. I will no longer venture out of the old homestead with nothing between me and the beast that is my hunger, but a mere tic tac. I'm determined to carry healthy snacks all the days of my life (and keep Christmas in my heart).

All the best, Kate

Friday Night Pizza!

It's Friday, the cakes are finished and gorgeous!
This cute little purse is among my favorites. I'm happy, I'm relaxed ( the shot of tequilla didn't hurt) dinner's well underway and my Gentlemen Husband and I had a very nice day together.

We made our own pizza and it looks mouth wateringly delicious. We made our own sauce, which is the best way to go because it's easier to control the fat, cholesterol, sugar and every other good thing. We're using whole wheat crust which has a lovely nutty flavor. I like sauted spinach, sliced roma tomatos, green olives and vegan cheese of the romano, parmesan variety. I only use a wee bit of the cheese, a 1/2 cup at most. You'd be surprised how much that is.I'm still getting used to it. Veggie Shreds don't melt very well, they sort of keep their shape, which is why I opt for the finely shredded variety.

We're having grilled pineapple for dessert. I saute it in a tiny bit of olive oil and add a little honey while it's grilling. I like it warm/cold so I don't saute it long enough heat completely through. Fresh pineapple is the best for this application.

I love this dinner, it's healthy and I don't feel cheated. I'm finding that I'm actually saving money with my new meal plan. I hesitate to order out now because there's usually nothing on the menu I feel I can eat and I have no clue what the 'numbers' are on stuff I don't prepare myself. I'm sure we'll go to a restaurant eventually but it will have to be one with seafood and salads and veggie type things. I hate to be that pain in the neck cover who asks for everything on the side, and special order this and that but I will be. I'll get over it!

Well, here's the tomato sauce recipe. It's subject to change depending on how you feel on any given day. I tend to cook with my senses and I'm a thrower. I'll toss things in randomly but I usually go with my nose. If it smells right toss it in. I also use this sauce for whole wheat mostaciolli, minestrone soup and spaghetti. We usually have some on hand. You never know when you'll need it.

Tomato Sauce for Pizza.

Saute an onion in olive oil until almost translucent
Add several cloves of garlic and saute until you can smell the garlic
Add 2- 15 ounce cans of tomato sauce and a can of diced tomatos
Add Seasonings. I use parlsey, basil, oregano, chili powder, sugar, salt, pepper and a pinch of nutmeg.
Let the sauce cook until thickened and yummy.
Adjust seasonings as necessary.

A run through the garden pizza is delicious and healthy. The leftovers are even better!!

All the best, Kate

The Etiquette on Christmas Decorations

I'm reasonably sure that according to Hoyle, Christmas decorations should be removed by Twelfth Night which I believe to be yesterday, yet I have no desire to take down the tree. I almost feel that since store decorations have been up since well before Thanksgiving there's a bit of wiggle room here.

I like the tree, each ornament is unique and truthfully I just put a new one up yesterday. It is one of three that I received this year as gifts. Two are from my daughter in law Cate, a snowglobe with a deer in the snow and an angel bell. The other from my friend Laurie, is a slice of strawberry pie and is the sister to a three tiered cake ornament she gave me last year.  I am enjoying looking at them and I'm not ready to stop.

There's something about wrapping them in tissue and putting them to sleep in a box for a year that makes me sad. Perhaps it would be a more valuable use of my time to leave them there and enjoy gazing at them. It may help to balance my chi. Through feng shui, chi  energy should be able to roam freely in order maintain balance. Chi is a very powerful thing. The balance of your surroundings can greatly affect your outlook and mood. If you use the color green in the East part of your house it improves your health and helps balance your family life. Our Christmas tree just happens to be green and coincidentally resides in the South East corner of our living room. Close enough for me and a very compelling reason to leave the tree standing.

You may think I might be grasping at straws, procrastinating or lazy. Not true. I like my stuff. I think there's something romantic about using it. Why should china sit in a cabinet, and candles go unburned. When I'm on my deathbed  am I going to blurt out that I really enjoyed NOT using the stuff  I've cherished throughout my life. Gifts from best friends, letters my gentlemen husband wrote me in college, treasures from relatives, things I'd try to save in a fire, these should be enjoyed. O Tannenbaum I'm not sick of you yet !

Who knows when it will come down. When I find another way to balance my Chi I might feel led to take down the tree and decorations.  For now it stands.

All the best, Kate